Another Opportunity for Growth
Inspired by on Lenny's Podcast
A Stanford professor has an acronym for when things go wrong: AFOG - Another Fucking Opportunity for Growth.
Carole Robin taught Stanford's most popular elective for over 20 years. When students failed at something - a conversation, a presentation, a relationship - she had a standard response.
'My first question when something has gone wrong is always: so what did you learn? Because there's always a lesson. And then usually what follows is, yeah, you just had an AFOG.'
AFOG: Another Fucking Opportunity for Growth.
'Sometimes AFOGs are more painful than others. Some AFOGs take longer to recover from than others. Most of the time they're recoverable, particularly if I've invested the energy in really unpacking what there was for me to learn.'
Your toddler spills milk everywhere. AFOG. Bedtime is a disaster. AFOG. You lose your temper. AFOG.
The reframe doesn't minimize the mess. It just reminds you: there's always a lesson. Find it. That's how messes become useful.
Every failure is data. Every AFOG is tuition in the school of parenting.
PM Theme: Learning from failure
Parenting Theme: Growth mindset
“My first question, when something has gone wrong, is always, so what did you learn? Because there's always a lesson, and then usually what follows is, yeah, you just had an AFOG.”Carole Robin · 01:17:12
“AFOG stands for Another Fucking Opportunity for Growth. Sometimes AFOGs are more painful than others. Some AFOGs take longer to recover from than others. Most of the time they're recoverable.”Carole Robin · 01:18:27
