What Do You Feel?

Jason Fried describes how decisions get made: 'How does this screen feel? How does this flow feel?' Feelings, not just facts.

With kids, we ask 'What happened?' 'What did you do?' 'What did they say?' These are knowledge questions.

What if we asked more feeling questions?

'How did that feel when she said that?' 'How does it feel when you think about school tomorrow?' 'How does your body feel right now?'

Kids often don't know what happened, or why they did something. But they usually know how they feel - if we give them space to access it.

'We're primarily feeling creatures. Even if we don't admit it, we are.'

The kid who can't explain the fight on the playground can often tell you their chest felt tight and their face got hot. That's data. That's a starting point.

Sometimes feelings are the only accurate information available. Ask about them.